thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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