shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
