How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
