Apparently you make a good broom.
I puked a lego.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
