how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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