covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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