Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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