I can tuck mytits in my pants
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Randomize
