Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
