there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
