why didn't you poke me back
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
