i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize