I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
