i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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