her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize