she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize