he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
