New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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