i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
