Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
