No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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