Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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