Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'm at about main and main street
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
