Do you still have your period?
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
