this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
