Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
