shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I will be naked everywhere
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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