Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
