too bad you live with your parents still
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
