They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
