"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize