I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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