Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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