We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
