Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
