I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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