Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
