And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
