Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize