im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
