I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
