Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
