"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize