It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
