I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
