Yo dont text me then not text me
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
