Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
