I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
