no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
