We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I think i got beer on your cat.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
